This has been around for a while, but if you haven’t seen it, you’ll join me in getting this song all up in your head.
We got it. You need it. You’ll find it.
It’s just like a mini….
Mall.
For those other times though, I have found my solution! The Hitch is a belt with suction cups on it that lets you latch onto anything, like a van, as shown in the picture above. Really, you sort of need to see it to appreciate the true insanity of the idea.
My big question is, why is the woman attached via her back? I know I would want to be face in, so I was suction hugging that vehicle for all it's worth. It would also be a lot more fun to do a flying hug at something to latch on, a la the David Letterman velcro suit.
Then I saw this joke he did about pillow fights. It wasn't a regular joke … it was something he had written on a whiteboard. I laughed and laughed and thought it was brilliant — unfortunately, my hotel didn't have Tivo (or even my TiFaux from home) so the joke was lost… until I saw it tonight on the Comedy Network.
Here it is, time shifted Canadian cable network style:
Pillow Fights
Man vs. Woman = Fun
Man vs. Man = Gay
Woman vs. Woman = Awesome
Man vs. Pillow = Crazy
Pillow vs. Pillow = Crazy Awesome
Then for dessert he offered, "One time I saw two geese fighting and I was like, 'This is a pillow fight ahead of time.'"
So good.
In the Pantene commercial shown above, Maria Menounos (who I admit, has very nice hair) talks about how easy it is to get the look she has, saying it’s all about the products.
To achieve her look she does the following:
Now, I am going to be very clear… I do not have great hair or a great hair style. Nobody has EVER said anything to me about my hair other than one of the following:
But honestly, do other people think her hair routine is “pretty easy”?? My hair routine is:
The astute observer will note that I had the same number of steps, but also note, she did not mention washing, conditioning or getting admiring looks from everyone. I’m pretty sure my routine takes about a half an hour less than hers. It probably looks like it takes an hour less than hers, but that’s not the point I’m trying to make — I know my hair doesn’t look as good, all I’m disputing is that what she describes as “pretty easy”. I’m pretty sure most guys don’t spend anywhere near that much time on their wedding days doing their hair, and the insinuation is that her method is pretty good for a standard day for a woman .
I’ll be honest, I don’t even know how to blow dry “in sections”. And what the heck is a “root lifter”???
How do you do it ladies??
When I was a kid, I had a novelty t-shirt that said “I’m with stupid” with an arrow pointing to the right. I loved that shirt.
I also loved my “Almost Prefect” shirt. (It was a humourous mis-spelling of “Almost Perfect”. Get it??)
When I was a kid, t-shirts with funny slogans or pictures on them were quite popular. So much so that the Blanford Square Mall, hotspot of Woodstock, had a whole retail stand for browsing and getting your own t-shirt pressed.
Sadly, times change. Novelty t-shirts seemed to go out of style. The t-shirt stand went out of business. The Blanford Square Mall slowly withered and died. It’s now a toyota plant.
But you know what they say, the more things change, the more they stay the same. Novelty t-shirts are back and wittier and cleverer than ever thanks to the Internet and social networking. The picture on the right, for example is from a Flickr set by a woman who not only has an “I’m with stupid” t-shirt, she takes photos of her with her friends while wearing it. Then there are all the cool web sites where you can buy t-shirts, vote on them, design your own and have them printed and worn by complete strangers. The sheer volume of them is intimidating though. How is one to find the perfect t-shirt in this crazy world of ours?
I’ll tell you how! With the wonderful Please Dress Me, a search engine for t-shirts. I’ve already found so many I love to post here, so I’ll leave you all to it.
After watching Die Another Day last night, I honestly needed a reminder that movies could be worse than that one, so I turned to a review of the previously mentioned Disaster Movie, and found this video review.
The review itself is funny, unlike the movie apparently, and did indeed reinforce that I could do a lot worse than the worst Pierce Brosnan Bond film. Best line from the review?
“This movie was shot in sh**-o-scope, with a sh**ty script….”
“Don’t you use that word ’script’ with this movie!”
It’s nice to know that one’s intuitions are good.